The Dark Side of Social Media

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'Yes, in the past, you lived the way the world lives, following the ruler of the evil powers that are above the earth. That same spirit is now working in those who refuse to obey God.'~ Ephesians 2:2, NCV

This past week or so, I’ve found myself an unhappily captive audience to some ‘stuff’ that has been going down on the pages of several Facebook friends.

I use the word ‘captive’ quite loosely because in reality, I DO have the choice to just click off the page/site and do something else, like:

• Pray
• Take a walk
• Clean my toilet
• Or grab a cup of coffee and hunker down with a good book

Any one of those things or another would be a whole lot better than watching the sniping via status updates that come through my daily news feed, but often, I find it’s like a train wreck – you just can’t look away, although you desperately want to.

I know there are many positive things to be said about social media.  You can get to know and converse with people around the world, anytime day or night. You can make new friends, reconnect with old friends and family members, find MIA classmates, coworkers and lost pets. 

There are pages for reminiscing about happier times and places, for finding and sharing information and favorite photos, for posting links to funny videos, and pages on which to ask for and find prayer and community support.  These are just a small handful of the things I’ve found to be good and helpful and fun.

But social media does indeed have its Dark Side, with Facebook and Twitter, seemingly more and more often lately, serving as the virtual playground for cyber bullies and mean girl cliques.

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Over and over, people pick on and call out others in ways I believe they WOULD NEVER think of doing face-to-face, using the anonymity of their keyboard and computer/iPhone screen as their shield, and brandishing their words like Crocodile Dundee’s knife or Peter’s Narnian sword, even as they make feeble attempts to undercut their snarkiness and ill intent with well-placed terms of endearment (like ‘sweetie,’ ‘honey,’ ‘dearie,’ and the infamous, overly-used and totally worn out, ‘why, bless your heart’).

The playground then becomes the battlefield, and I’ve witnessed both the godly and the godless, Christian and carnal 'friends' warring and wounding one another.  And THIS, my friends, should not be.

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For others, when this occurs, the safest, easiest and best option would seem to be to retreat. Keep your head low and run away. Wave the white flag of surrender and give up. Kill the accounts and unplug from all things social media. To be honest, I consider doing this at least once a week. 

However, if you’re among those of us whom God has challenged to faithfully commit to shine His light into a ‘dark’ place by bringing His encouragement, joy, hope, support, compassion and understanding to the land of social media, then take a deep breath. Take heart. And remember the following things:

• Not everyone will like nor want to hear what you have to say. But we weren’t created to please man, but instead, to please God (Ezekiel 2:3-7; Galatians 1:10)

• Have confidence in your God given gifts and purpose (1 Thessalonians 2:4; 1 Peter 4:11; 2 Peter 1:3)

• Put on your armor daily. Not just pieces here and there, but the FULL armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-17)

• Stand firm (Ephesians 6:11, 13; 1 Corinthians 15:58; 1 Corinthians 16:13)

• Don’t give up or lose heart (2 Corinthians 4:1; Galatians 6:9; Hebrews 12:3)

• Press on (Philippians 3:14)

• And stick close to the Lord, Who is Your Commander-In-Chief and your place of refuge and protection (Psalm 32:7; Psalm 61:3; Psalm 91:1-4; Romans 8:31-37)

Because while there are those out there on the virtual playground who seem to delight in pushing and kicking you around, and even more on the cyber battlefield who want to crush, 'kill,' and silence you – there are that many more who are hungry and thirsty and desperate for the message of hope, help and healing that is available through a life given over to Jesus Christ.

The message God has seen fit for you to carry on and hold out to them.

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'You groped your way through that murk once, but no longer. You’re out in the open now. The bright light of Christ makes your way plain. So no more stumbling around. Get on with it! The good, the right, the true—these are the actions appropriate for daylight hours. Figure out what will please Christ, and then do it.' ~Ephesians 5:8-10, The Message

Merry Happy Christmas Greetings

If you're counting down the days, it is only 2 more days left until Christmas. As Eloise, (from one of my favorite Christmas movies, 'Eloise At Christmastime') likes to declare: "It's Christmas Eve Eve!"

People are hustling and bustling to get that last minute shopping done. Running in and out of doors, rushing in and out of stores, wishing one and all a....a what? 

A "Merry Christmas!!!??" A "Happy Holiday!!!??" Or perhaps you're a "Seasons Greetings!!" kind of a person. 

Which one makes you smile with joy....or grit your teeth in irritation? Does one offend you more deeply than the other? Or is being politically correct not even a blip on your holiday radar screen?

For years, I was on the 'Merry Christmas' side of the Christmas Greetings Crusade. Or 'The War on Christmas' to which it's often referred. If someone, be it on social media, at the mall, at work, at a toll booth, etc., dared to wish me 'Seasons Greetings' or 'Happy Holidays,' I would return their salutation with my own MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! faster and with more force than Serena Williams returning a tennis opponent's serve at the US Open. 

But these days, I find myself sad, weary and somewhat irritated over all the arguments and the wars and the ugly back-and-forth, mean-spirited comments I have seen lately on social media regarding these greetings of the season. 

This season that is SUPPOSED to be about celebrating a love so deep, so incredible, so amazing, so breathtaking; a love that would cause our Creator God to send His One and Only, kingly Son, Jesus Christ, into this world -- not wrapped in royal robes, but in fragile skin like ours -- to serve and save us. 

But which seems more about celebrating consumerism, commercialism and our crowing about being among the Christian illuminati of society.

Now, I'm certainly not saying we who follow Christ and call ourselves Christians should ever be ashamed or afraid of wishing someone -- anyone -- a Merry Christmas. Neither am I suggesting that we refrain from doing so. 

But what I AM saying is that there's no need for us to get our noses out of joint when someone fails to say it to us, nor should we respond to someone's wish for us to "Have a happy holiday!" with a pompous and indignant 

"WE SAY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!"

We need to be mindful of how we come across to others.

And it would serve us well to remember that Jesus reserved His harshest criticism of and toughest lessons for those who considered themselves to be the elite and religious 'know-it-alls': those self-righteous Pharisees, who always seemed to spend way too much of their time in the New Testament stalking Jesus; eavesdropping on all of His conversations and teachings; nitpicking about them, and trying to trip Him up on everything He said.

During one such time, the following particular conversation transpired between Jesus and another man:

"...when the Pharisees heard that He had silenced the Sadducees with His reply, they met together to question Him again. One of them, an expert in religious law, tried to trap Him with this question: “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” ~ Matthew 22:34-40 (NLT)

In light of this, and in my honest opinion, I seriously DOUBT that Jesus gives a flying fig if we say 'Merry Christmas,' or if we say 'Seasons Greetings.'

Just as long as whatever we say, we say joyfully, with His love flowing from our heart, our soul, our mind...and our lips.

That's My King -- Do You Know Him?

When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus’ body.  Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb and they asked each other, “Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?”

But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed.

“Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid Him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see Him, just as He told you." ~Mark 16:1-7

Easter Sunday. Resurrection Sunday.  Whatever you choose to call it, it's a day of joyful celebration among Christians worldwide. 

Raised from the dead by the power of God's Holy Spirit, Jesus stepped out of the tomb, alive once more, victorious over sin and death. Victorious for us. 

Jesus is indeed King of Kings and LORD of lords, Prince of peace, Savior of the world.

Do you know Him?  

"You know the way to the place where I am going.”

Thomas said to Him, “Lord, we don’t know where You are going, so how can we know the way?”

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me. If you really knew Me, you would know My Father as well. From now on, you do know Him and have seen Him.” ~ John 14:4-7

This is an absolutely wonderful video rendition of Dr. S.M. Lockridge's sermon, entitled 'The Seven Way King.'  May it bring you to tears and cheers

Silence Before The Shearers

Just a few moments ago, I was audience to a 'war of words' taking place between quite a few folks on Twitter.  At one point, even WITH a scorecard, you wouldn't have been able to tell who was who among the players. Some professed to be Christian, but with the temperatures rising and the 'Haterade' flowing like a mountain spring, you seriously could have fooled me.

Earlier on Facebook, someone made a comment on a friend's page how they were struggling to 'like' Christians over a particular heated and much publicized debate; a debate where the more people weigh in with their opinions on it, the more they seem to fan the flames of hatred. And this person who made the comment was a Christian themselves. 


With social media such a huge part of everyone's lives these days, doesn't it seem that more and more, we feel we can say whatever we want -- Christian or not -- and we always MUST have the last word? That's just how it seems to me anyway.

And then two Scripture verses kind of popped into my head (I say 'kind of' because since I'm not Barbie Bible Scholar, I didn't remember them word for word, I actually had to look them up):

He was oppressed and treated harshly, yet He never said a word. He was led like a lamb to the slaughter. And as a sheep is silent before the shearers, He did not open his mouth. ~  Isaiah 53:7

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When they hurled their insults at Him, He did not retaliate; when He suffered, He made no threats. Instead, He entrusted himself to Him who judges justly. ~ 1 Peter 2:23

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As a result of all of this, I got to wondering just what my life would look like if I truly followed Jesus's example here and applied these verses to my everyday interactions with people -- face-to-face and online.


How would your life look, dear one?

Just some food for thought today.

The Snarkiness of Christianity

Wednesday, March 13, 2013, was certainly a day for the history books. After the siting of the white smoke rising out of the Sistine Chapel's chimney, social media sites, newsfeeds and blogs were all abuzz about the election of the Catholic Church’s new pontiff, Argentinian Cardinal Jorge Bergoglio, now known as Pope Francis I, the pontiff of firsts. CNN's webpage reports that Pope Francis is

• the first non-European pope of the modern era
• the first Latin American pope
• the first Jesuit
• the first to take the name of Francis

As a former Catholic, I was delighted for my Catholic and Latin American friends, as it was such an exciting moment in history and the beginning of a new era for them! However, I was not so delighted, Christian and non-denominational gal that I am, over the many comments made by folks in response to the question posed on various news sites and social media pages after the announcement:

‘What do you think about the election of the new pope?’

I’m certain those who posted this question expected a plethora of responses ranging from hopeful and ecstatic to doubtful and indifferent .

But I’m guessing that the folks who maintain the social media page of a particular Christian organization NEVER expected the many, many negative and damaging comments made by....gulp...fellow Christians.

GASP!! The heck you say?

Yes, my friends. The snarkiness of Christianity came out in a big, ugly way on the Facebook page of  'I Am Second'. The folks at I Am Second describe themselves, as it states in the picture above, as ‘a movement meant to inspire people of all kinds to live for God and for others.’  They place much of their emphasis on humility, encouraging people to serve God by serving others FIRST, while humbly relegating themselves to second place.  That's some great stuff there, because that's what Jesus did. 

I’m not faulting those over at I Am Second for posting that question. I’m sure it was asked with good intentions and in all sincerity, as many of its page members are from the Catholic faith, as well as other faith denominations.  No doubt they may have expected some negativity and indifference here and there. But I truly don’t think they expected the onslaught of finger-pointing, name-calling and mockery that followed. 

Before I began writing out this post, I surfed over to their Facebook page and found that the post in question had been removed. I can’t say that I blame them and I actually applaud them for doing so. I must admit, I was appalled and saddened by the over-the-top mean-spiritedness and arrogance of people’s words and attitudes towards those within the Catholic faith.  So many spoke of the pope and Catholics with the same sneering contempt that one reserves for speaking of crack addicts, child molesters and Adolph Hitler. 

It was a prime example of Christians behaving badly.

And that prompted me to wonder what someone brand new to the Christian faith would have thought after reading such arrogant, sarcastic, self-righteous and hurtful comments.

Or how about someone who is seeking a relationship with Christ; or someone who has never felt the need or a desire for God but who perhaps stumbled upon I Am Second’s Facebook page or was encouraged by someone to check it out? What do you suppose they would have thought about those comments and, more importantly, about the Christians who posted them?

And what do you suppose….Jesus thought about them?

I’ll get to that and finish up in my next post. Stay tuned.

Father, Forgive Them....

When they came to the place called The Skull, there they crucified Him and the criminals, one on the right and the other on the left.  But Jesus was saying, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”’  ~ Luke 23:33-34

Judging from the low amount of page views my previous post received, I’m thinking that forgiveness doesn’t rank very high among the Top 40 popular, Must Read blog post topics (If you missed it, please CLICK HERE to read 'Forgiveness'). 

I can understand why.  Like politics and religion, forgiveness can be a touchy, volatile subject.  Truth be told, most people would not only rather avoid thinking and talking about forgiveness, but more than likely would rather refrain from initiating and acting upon it as well.

Because forgiving one another is hard. REALLY hard. Not just for the small annoyances in life, but for those over-the-top, ‘how could anyone do something like this?!’ things, too.  Things that seem almost impossible to forgive.

I don’t have to remind anyone reading here that there are A LOT of thoughtless, cruel, heartless people in this world. From liars, thieves, drunk/drugged drivers, embezzlers, adulterous spouses to murderers, rapists, pedophiles, sexual predators, etc., there are people who don’t seem to care about the havoc they wreak or the carnage of broken people they leave behind; people who delight in the pain of others, be it physical, emotional or mental pain.  All you have to do is open up your newspaper, turn on your television or radio, power up your computer or simply walk out your front door to be witness to what’s going on in this fallen world.  When we read about an elderly person savagely attacked in their home, or learn of yet another child who’s been kidnapped and found miles away later on, brutally murdered, or we find ourselves the hurting victim of a crime of the body or the heart, forgiveness for the perpetrator isn’t on our minds or in our hearts, is it?  Nope.

Revenge is.

We’d rather see these monsters of society get what’s coming to them.  And if we’re totally honest, deep inside, wouldn’t we all like to get a whack at them ourselves, showing up in courtrooms or jail cells, like those mobs of angry villagers in old movies, brandishing our pitchforks and torches?

But, if we say we are Christians, aren’t we expected to brandish mercy and grace, and to extend forgiveness instead?  And when WE sin, don’t we expect our offenses – no matter what they are -- to be forgiven? Don’t we BEG for God’s mercy and grace to catch us when slip and fall headlong into sin?  Of course we do. I know I do.

Forgiven, by Thomas Blackshear

We can memorize the following Bible verse and gladly declare it and claim it as a ‘life verse:’

“But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: ‘While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.’” ~ Romans 5:8 (NIV). 

But what about committing THIS C.S. Lewis quote to memory and living it out:

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.” 

Ouch.

I have to wonder – how did Jesus feel right before He cried out from the cross those mind-boggling words?

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they’re doing!”

Did Jesus wrestle with forgiving His haters, His betrayers, His murderers, much as He did in the garden at Gethsemane, struggling in anguished prayer to do His Father’s will and accept the overwhelming cup He’d been offered? He very well may have, but we have no way of knowing, since there is no record in the Bible of this particular wrestling match between the human and the Divine sides of Jesus in that instance.

To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.  In me. If Jesus Christ, the Son of God, could do the unthinkable and ask forgiveness for the very people who despised Him, who betrayed Him, who mocked, beat and tormented Him, and nailed Him onto a wooden cross – WHILE He was hanging on that cross, close to breathing His final breath, and DYING FOR THEIR SINS AND OURS – can we do any less?  Can we remember that it’s not us but God Who says, “Vengeance is Mine, and I will repay?” Can we leave the justice and judgment calls up to Him, and just put down our pitchforks and torches…and learn to forgive instead?

It’s not easy, this forgiving of others. Oh, how I know just how difficult it can be!  So please join me next time for some closing thoughts in my final installment (and in case you’re wondering….no, I hadn’t planned on this turning into a mini-series of sorts)!

Walking Through The Hard

When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was. ~ Job 2:11-13, NIV

I wanted to share something with all of you out here in the Blogosphere, and it is now my extreme honor to do so.  


Today's post focuses on how we as Christians often deal with those people in our lives who are broken, hurting, struggling and suffering.  Many on a daily basis.   Most times, since we seem to be really uncomfortable around them or are unsure what to say, we simply avoid them.  


Or sometimes, like Job's buddies, we try to pinpoint their problems with misspoken words in the hopes of 'fixing' them.  Job's friends were really off to a great start in comforting him in his time of need....until they opened their mouths.


Or perhaps -- you yourself are among the broken, the hurting, the struggling and the suffering.  And nobody really seems to understand what you're dealing with or knows what to say to you.


I did not write this.  It was written by someone else, a young woman named Rebekah Bell, who posted it on her Facebook page.  Rebekah's friend, Christi Armstrong, a Christian mom and poetry and blog writer (like many of us here), felt her friend's message was of such an important nature that she shared it on HER Facebook page, which is where I found and read it.


And after reading it, I too felt so strongly about the subject matter, that I contacted Christi and asked for her and Rebekah's permission to share it myself. 


As Christi noted when she reposted this:

"The only way things will change is if we all actually change them. Jesus went to the hurting and sat with them, where they were. He didn't sit in His comfortable life and avoid the pain others were going through. We need to start living like Jesus..." 


Amen, sister, amen!  Read on -- let Rebekah Bell's words and her heart's cry seep not only into your mind, but into your heart and soul as well.  And perhaps -- let them change you and how you see those in your life who are hurting as they attempt to walk through the hard......

To Walk Through The Hard 
by Rebekah Bell


So God is teaching me how to “walk through the hard." 

This past month has been insane.  Not just because of stuff in my universe… but because many people I love are going through genuinely "tough times".  Tough health news.  Tough relationship news.  Tough job news.  Tough times in their lives.

And what has been unusual for me is to watch Christians "dive into" these tough situations.  These situations are in different parts of the country.  Dealing with different varieties of Christians.  But the response, across the board, seems to be the same.  Well meaning followers are attempting to fix other people’s complex situations with "one size fits all" answers.

Without divulging details of anything, many of these situations are degenerating. Some involve diseases that won’t end in recovery.  Relationships that are broken in ways that would be difficult to ever fix.  Jobs that were lost because of a dying economy, making finding replacement positions immediately unlikely.  

In this, how does the church help?  Promises of prayer. Which are nice, but lonely solutions.  People sit alone in their damaged lives, while you wander off to your happier situation to pray.  Some tossed around trite scripture passages talking about "seasons" or "making things perfect in their time" or that "God has great plan for you."  Which are nice.  But like handing someone a flashlight without batteries, when faith is shaken by circumstance.

And sadly, I am not much help either.  My heart isn’t full of grand solutions.  Recently, I had to face the reality of my Grandmother’s mental condition.  First, you have to understand, my Grandmother was my rock.  She helped raise me.  More than a Grandmother, she was my friend. We chatted about school.  She taught me to drive. When times were hard, growing up, she let me sit in her house and cry (that happened a lot).  My Grandmother now seems to have developed dementia.  The person that I loved has changed into someone unpredictable.  I am watching one of the most precious relationships in my life slip away and I can’t stop it.

To help me deal, someone gave me the "it gets better" speech.  Seriously.  From this, there is no better.  The relationship that I once had is going to slip away, not get better.  

What I need is people who are willing to help me "walk through the hard."  Not tell me "look for the better."

But this is where Christians seem to "land."  Easy quotes that are supposed to make things better.  A prayer.  Pat on the head.  And you are off.  Faith bright and shiny.  Into a world with complex situations. Shouting "keep the faith" at people, from the safety of shore, as they bail water from a sinking boat.  

Why can’t we let the bad stuff be bad?  The hard stuff be hard?  Situations remain broken.  Why are we quick to stick a band aid on a broken leg and tell people that they should be able to walk around.  Where does this impulse come from?

I think that it is because faith in a loving God is threatened by unlovely circumstances.  

And that is hard to deal with.  To travel that road.  And we are generally unwilling to do it.  We pray for protection in our lives and are happily isolated from the difficulties of others.  Holding out for them pretty pictures of uncomplicated faith, rather than sitting with them in the dark places, where there aren‘t beautiful things.  

I think we fear the hard.  That is why we can’t let it be hard.  And to me, empirically, the inevitable conclusion seems to be that God is frequently unwilling to make things easy.  He lets them be hard.  

Thus, if we are to call ourselves a people of a true faith, it is time for us to embrace the presence of hard things. To seek out darkness and not run away.  To resist the urge to make the complex, less than what it truly is.  To allow the faith to exist in the dark and forbidding places of life.  Situations where "better" is unlikely.  And not abandon those who are in pain, to the pain they are feeling. 


It is time to learn to walk through the hard.


"Rejoice with those who rejoice, mourn with those who mourn." Romans 12:15, NIV