Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me, for in You my soul takes refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of Your wings until the disaster has passed. ~ Psalm 57:1
Yesterday at church, I heard a beautiful song of worship I haven't heard in quite some time, although I actually have this particular version on my iPod. I first heard it years ago on some CD my daughter borrowed from our church library. It was so moving to me then and it remains so today. Originally, it was written as a hymn entitled, "The Advocate," by Charitie Lees Bancroft almost 150 years ago. While many artists have recorded it, I chose to share Sojourn's beautiful and simple rendition of it.
May the lyrics touch your heart, as they have mine. And on those dark and lonely days when you feel lost -- as I often can -- and are prone to forget -- as I often am -- may this song remind you of who and Whose you are, and invite you to draw ever closer to your Abba.
Do not be afraid, for I am with you. I will gather you and your children from east and west. I will say to the north and south, ‘Bring my sons and daughters back to Israel from the distant corners of the earth. ~ Isaiah 43:5-6, NLT
Rebellious. Stubborn. Mouthy. Sullen. Mean-spirited. Disrespectful. What do these words have in common? Anyone, anyone? Bueller...Bueller?? Answer: they are words that are often used to describe teens. Now, I know there are folks out there who have teens who are well-behaved, respectful, sweet-natured, etc., folks who cannot relate to this and would beg to differ with this description. But I don't know any of them personally. As the mother of two teens -- a 19 year old son and an almost 16 year old daughter -- I've found the waters of the teenage years choppy, difficult to navigate and quite frankly, very murky. The advice I found in the many, MANY books I've read about dealing with teens rarely seemed to address what I was dealing with at that time, and when it did, it never seemed to 'work' with my two. I've done everything possible to raise them the best I could, dedicating them to God and praying for them, although not always consistently. I am an imperfect parent who, more often than not, has placed them both on God's altar, only to run and snatch them back again when I slip and fall into my 'Mother Knows Best' mode. These days, it's painful for me to stand on the shoreline and watch as both of them seem to drift not only farther away from me, but away from God. Yes, they attend church, Sunday School and youth group; they've gone on retreats and have been involved in many missions projects/trips. But outside of that, they act, think and speak like those heavily ensconced in the world. They are often drawn to and embrace things that break my heart and cause me great anxiety. People encourage me, telling me it's just a phase. And yes, I know much of it very often IS a phase. But the very weak, foolish and doubting Thomas part of me is worried and afraid. I ache. I cry. And yes, I do pray.
But some days, I just feel like giving up. I'm losing hope. There's been an email, sitting unopened in my Inbox for close to a week. It's entitled, "Your Children Will Return." I have no good excuses as to why I left it sitting there for so long. I just did. This morning, however, I opened it and found an article written by a woman named Joy Frangipane Marion. She is the daughter of Francis Frangipane, a Christian author and the founding pastor of River of Life Ministries in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Apparently, back in the day, Joy was quite the sullen, rebellious, mouthy, disrespectful and mean-spirited prodigal daughter, causing her family -- but especially her father -- much pain, heartache and grief.
But these days find her the happily married mother of two, a successful businesswoman and back in a right relationship with her earthly father AND her heavenly Father. A precious testimony to God's unfailing love, protection and provision, and to her parents' faithful, tear-ridden prayers. Near the end of the article, Joy has this to say, and I share it here in the hopes that it will encourage someone today, as it has for me; someone who is also having great difficulty in navigating those murky, choppy waters of the teen years (and even beyond to young adulthood); someone who is drowning and losing hope:
Listen, please don't give up on your teenagers. Don't sacrifice God's standards of righteousness to appeal to their carnal nature. They can't respect you for it and God won't honor it.Your children were not consecrated to Satan; they were dedicated to the Lord. He has had His hand on them and He will not forget them. He has heard your prayers and He is faithful to your cries. He is God. ***
So we must not get tired of doing good, for we will reap at the proper time if we don't give up. ~ Galatians 6:9, HCSB
When things are flying at you from all directions; when you feel bombarded and frustrated and weary, ill-equipped to face what (or whom) is staring you down; when anxiety and fear threaten to paralyze you today; when whatever you have done and are currently doing looks like it's not making any difference to anyone, but instead, seems like SUCH a waste of time -- take a breath. Look to and lean on your God and your King.
"The LORD, the LORD is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation." ~ Isaiah 12:2
We all need a savior. Without a savior, we would all be dead in our sins.
I must see Jesus, not just as a savior, but -- making this personal -- as my Savior.
Yes, Jesus left everythingbehind, humbling Himself and taking on human form, and came to this earth to be our atoning sacrifice, our perfect, spotless, Lamb of God, to save us from our sins. He is indeed our Savior.
But today, I'm not looking at Jesus as the Hero of a one-time rescue mission. No, for me, right now -- I NEED to see and KNOW HIM as One Who saves me on a daily basis. Jesus is Whom I will look to today and every day to save me from:
Suppose one of you had a hundred sheep and lost one. Wouldn't you leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the lost one until you found it? When found, you can be sure you would put it across your shoulders, rejoicing, and when you got home call in your friends and neighbors, saying, 'Celebrate with me! I've found my lost sheep!' ~ Luke 15:4-6, The Message
The Lost Sheep, by B.R. Burton
I still get chills whenever I watch the video I've posted below. It's been around for quite awhile now. Perhaps you've seen it before. Or perhaps this is your first time viewing it. If so, all I can say is, 'Be prepared.'
The skit itself was performed at an event called Winterfest, in Knoxville, Tennessee, back in 2006. YouTube boasts over 19 million views of it on their site, and I'm sure I've viewed it at least one of those million. Okay, I'm embellishing, as my darling daughter would say. But hey -- I've really seen this lots and LOTS of times, often posting it on my Facebook page over the years. It's simple -- amateurish, even - yet I have found it to be most profound and so powerful. I've seen other versions of it done by other church youth groups, but this one remains my personal favorite and close to my heart. As I said, it still gives me chills.
When we first come to know the Lord and surrender everything -- our heart, our mind, our spirit, our very life -- it's a beautiful thing, isn't it? Everything is so wonderful and new. And He becomes everything to us and truly is our First Love, as described in Revelation 2:4.
But, Revelation 2:4 isn't just a verse containing a lovely sentiment and description of Who the Lord is; it's actually an admonishment to the church of Ephesus, pointing out that they have forsaken the One Who is --was-- their First Love.
But I have this [one charge to make] against you: that you have left (abandoned) the love that you had at first [you have deserted Me, your First Love]. ~ Amplified Bible
As time goes by, so many things can come between us and the Lord -- love/sexual relationships, money, alcohol/drugs/party lifestyle, warped body image, as portrayed in this video, AS WELL AS those things and people we consider to be 'good,' like our careers, our service to God through our or someone else's ministries, our families -- pushing us farther and farther away from Him, until Jesus becomes almost like a distant memory. He tries to get our attention, but we no longer see Him. We can no longer hear His voice.
Because, much like the lost sheep that Jesus spoke of in the Book of Luke, we've wandered far away from our good and loving Shepherd, due to our rebellious nature or by responding to the enticing call of other things or people.
And 'suddenly,' we find ourselves in some deep, harrowing trouble and precarious situations.
The Rescue, by Nathan Greene
And also from the Book of Luke, like the prodigal son, we become so lost and hopeless, ensconced in our own ilk, blinded and consumed by our guilt, we begin thinking our Lord can't POSSIBLY still love us.
Prodigal Son -- The Turning Point, by Stephanie Frostad
But unlike the prodigal son, we begin to falsely believe that He is so disappointed with us, that surely He has turned His back on us and abandoned and forsaken us. No WAY will He forgive us this time and we listen to the voice of the enemy gleefully (yet falsely) warning us that no, we CAN'T go home again. We see nothing in our future but pain, suffering and darkness, and come to believe that the only way to end it is: death.
I have been there in my life. And more than once. Yes, I've believed the dark one's lies. I've come to the end of my rope and each time, decided that it was better to hang myself with it than to believe that Jesus was still holding onto it -- and me -- and was desperately trying to pull me back to Him.
Perhaps you've been there, too, dear reader. Or maybe, you're there right now. Your shaking hands are clutching onto that end piece of rope, wondering what to do next, wondering if it's even worth holding onto at all.
Let me tell you with all honesty, sincerity, love and hope that YES, YES, YES, IT IS WORTH HOLDING ONTO!!!! Hold on tight, and let the Lord Jesus Christ pull you to safety -- to Him!!! Let HIM break your chains, knock down and destroy your enemies, cleanse you of your sins, guilt and shame. Let Jesus rescue you! Because you are EVERYTHING to Him!
I'm forever grateful that Jesus's voice broke through my deafness, calling me back to Him. I'm forever grateful that the Light of His Presence broke through my darkness. I'm forever grateful that when I've come to the end of my rope, instead of winding it around my neck, I clung tightly to it and allowed Him to pull me back to the safety of His welcoming arms. I'm forever grateful for Christ's endless love, His boundless mercy and grace, and His relentless pursuit of His little wandering black sheep as He lovingly, tenderly reminds me, over and over, that He is and always will be, EVERYTHING to headstrong, prodigal me.
The Good Shepherd, by Nathan Greene
Today, no matter how far you've wandered; no matter what you've done or become involved with; no matter how hopeless you or your situation may seem.....won't you believe that Jesus loves you SO MUCH, He will drop EVERYTHING to go searching for you? That He will set aside EVERYTHING to come running and fight for your life?
Today, I did something that I haven't done for a very long time. Or...come to think of it...maybe never at all.
I lived in the moment.
I'm normally not a spontaneous person. I like to know what I'm doing and when I'm going to do it. To-do lists can be found in most every room of my house. Change up my schedule and you can be certain that I will freak out a bit. Sometimes more than a bit. I could be considered someone who is anal-retentive, and not a person who thrives on living in the moment.
I can also be overly concerned with how others see me and what they think of me. I don't like to call attention to myself (although I did many years ago), preferring instead to remain just another face in the crowd.
But today, I did things a little bit differently.
Today, in the middle of a sudden downpour, I responded to the urge to take off my shoes and socks and step out from my dry and protective little spot on my front porch right into the rain. While I didn't dance in it, I did jump and splash in the puddles, kicking water as I happily waded through the small flash flood raging down my street. I didn't care how I looked or who saw me acting like an overgrown 5 year old.
It was different. It was spontaneous. It was fun! It was freeing!
It was living in the moment.
Later in the evening, I went for a walk. Most times, I walk to help maintain my health and body weight. Sometimes, I walk to clear my head of all the gunk that is often swirling through it. Tonight, it was to do both. I'll often drive to a local park or to my daughter's high school track to walk, or I'll just walk through my neighborhood a few times. Tonight, however, I strayed beyond the borders of my neighborhood, walking about a mile and a half from it.
As I was walking, I received a phone call from a lovely friend of mine; an older, wise and godly woman whom I've known for about twelve years now, and who, as of late, has become a mentor to me. She didn't have an easy life for most of her years. Yet, she is a joyful and thankful woman who loves, leans on, and walks and talks with God every day. His love, grace, mercy, peace and compassion practically radiate from her, and she is as authentic a person and follower of Christ as the day is long.
We had a wonderful conversation. She asked me how I was doing, knowing I've been battling depression recently, and I told her that I was trying to look at various circumstances and people in my life from a different perspective -- a more thankful, grateful perspective. She told me she was so happy to hear that and then mentioned this 'little book' (she always uses the word 'little' to describe things -- little book, little song, little prayer, little verse) someone had given her called ''One Thousand Gifts,' by Ann Voskamp, asking me if I'd ever heard of it or read it. I laughed and told her that so many people I know have read it or are currently reading it, but I had yet to do so. She offered to let me borrow it, and went on to say that this was what the book was about:
living in the moment and
finding things to be grateful for in both the grace-filled and adversity-filled moments of life
She encouraged me to look around me as I continued on my walk tonight, to be on the look out for things to be grateful for that God might have waiting for me just around the bend, and to be ready to 'live in the moment.' We ended our conversation with my promising her that I would try.
And I did.
As I walked, I gave thanks for the sudden coolness today's rain had brought, and for the vivid colors of the flowers in all the yards I passed.
I listened to and was thankful for the beautiful soundtrack of music that accompanied me, from the medley of tunes from a cheerful and rather loud mockingbird who seemed to follow me down one street, to the varied tones of several different wind chimes hanging from a neighbor's porch to the wind whispering through the tree leaves.
I enjoyed and thanked God for a glorious display of light to which I was a privileged audience, as huge rays of the evening sun suddenly broke through some dark clouds, transforming the sky into a breathtaking heavenly and almost sacred scene. All that was missing was a choir of angels belting out the Hallelujah Chorus (oh, but believe me, they were singing in my head)!
I had a huge smile on my face, and very briefly wondered if someone might decide to call the police as I realized I had stopped and was standing halfway up someone's driveway, staring up at the sky. But oddly enough (odd for me), I didn't care.
Because I was living in the moment.
Then, I passed by the elementary school that my son and daughter had attended and thought it would be nice to sit for just a few minutes on one of the benches in the playground. But then, I looked a little further past the bench -- to the swings -- and thought, "Why sit when you can fly?"
And decided yet again to live in the moment.
The same overgrown 5 year old who splashed in rain puddles earlier in the day, now ran over to the playground equipment, hopped on one of the swings and swung up to the sky, putting my head all the way back, despite my vertigo, so I could continue seeing and enjoying God's light show. Yes, my head spun for awhile, but it was SO worth it. I laughed out loud as I saw a robin standing nearby, curiously studying me, no doubt wondering what this big person was doing on a kid's swing. Then, I noticed a little boy and his dad over by the sliding board, staring at me, too, probably wondering the same thing. But it was okay.
Because, once again:
It was different.
It was spontaneous. It was fun! It was freeing!
It was living in the moment.
How often in the course of our day do we go through the motions, always taking the same path, never deviating from the norm or jumping into the pool of spontaneity with all of our clothes on? How often do we miss the sweet, funny, beautiful and tender blessings God delights to give us, if only we would choose to pull our eyes away from our iPads and iPhones and look around us? When was the last time you laid down on the ground, not worrying about getting your clothes or your hair dirty or finding an ant or two (or three) crawling up your arm, to just watch and enjoy the clouds slowly moving by? Perhaps picking out a few of them that resemble animals or people or even a heart.
What will tomorrow bring? For me, I hope it's a day emptied of most of my To Do lists and instead, filled with more spontaneous opportunities to be thankful and grateful to the One Who has numbered all of my days and longs for me to enjoy each and every one of them. Living in the moment.
What will tomorrow bring for you, dear one? Will you choose to live in the moment?
Let them praise Your great and awesome name -- Your name is holy! ~ Psalm 99:3, NLT
Oh, my friends -- indeed it is! Indeed He is!! There is just no way for us to ever wrap our brains around how this awesome, majestic, Creator God -- our Abba Father -- could love and care about and intentionally, consistently pursue a people so small, so flawed, so often ignorant and rebellious towards Him.
But He does. And all we can do in response to that perfect love is fall to our knees and sing out to Him:
'You are Holy. Oh, Holy!'
I can't comprehend Your infinitely beautiful and perfect love;
Oh, I've dreamed dreams of majesty as brilliant as a billion stars,
But they're never bright enough, after all.
You are Holy
Oh, Holy!
Holy, Holy, Holy!
I will sing a song for You, my God, with everything I have in me,
But it's never loud enough, after all.
You are Holy
Oh Holy!
Holy, Holy, Holy!
Heaven and earth are full, full of Your glory, glory,
My soul it overflows full of Your glory, Your glory;
Oh, blessed is He who reigns, full of Your glory, Your glory,
My cup, it can't contain all of Your glory, Your glory
Hosanna, we are found, after all, You are
Holy
Oh Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy
I can't comprehend
You're infinitely beautiful ~ lyrics by David Crowder Band
I'd planned on posting here early this morning, but circumstances beyond my control hindered me from doing so. As often happens (more than I care to admit), I had way too much going on before I ran out the door for church to be in a worshipful, let alone focused, state of mind, and I was trying hard to avoid being late (again), so I could at least be worshipful and focused when I walked sprinted into church.
I had a completely different song all set to go here, too. Not that it wasn't a good one -- it is. Yet obviously, it's meant for another time. I woke up with today's song firmly implanted in my head. And now I know why.
Once I got to church, the unexpected happened. Without going into loads of details, we had a medical incident happen midway through the first service, involving one of our older saints, who is my neighbor and who catches a ride with us to church almost every Sunday. It was, to say the least, disconcerting and a bit scary, but I was amazed at how many people stepped up to the plate immediately to assist and how lovingly, how tenderly and how well it was done. Our young pastor handled it all with such calm, compassion, grace, mercy and love, calling everyone who was not assisting to just lift up their hands and cry out loud to the LORD on this person's behalf and encouraging all to worship and praise Him in the midst of the goings on. Which they promptly did. I've not seen anything like it, really.
I am thankful and grateful that nothing -- NOTHING -- takes our Father God by surprise. He made sure that particular people with professional medical backgrounds were at church today, at this particular service time, and that they were easily and quickly accessible before the paramedics arrived to take over. He surrounded this person with church members who had loving hearts, cool heads, a good understanding of and compassion for the elderly and strong arms to help and comfort.
It's several hours later and while I'm still a bit shaky from it all, mostly I'm in awe, once again, over how awesome and amazing God truly is, and just how worthy He is of our praise and worship.
Some of the lyrics to this song are as follows:
'I stand amazed at Who You are, I'm overcome by what You've done.'
'I'm here right now, I need You now I lift Your Name above the doubt, This is my offering for You.'
'I leave my burden at Your feet In You I find my victory, There is nothing You can't do.'
No, there certainly is NOTHING God can't do.
Two things I would like to ask of all of you reading this post. First, even though most or all of you may not know this elder saint (unless you're from my church and were at this particular service today), would you please take a moment to lift her up in prayer? I'm still unsuccessful at getting in touch with any of her immediate family to let them know what transpired today and where she is. Thankfully, some members of our church family went to the hospital and are still there with her.
And second, won't you join me in giving all worship and praise to our God? For it truly is ALL for Him.
