Fear Factor

This morning, after my son had pulled out of his parking spot and drove off to work at the ungodly hour of 5:30 AM, I remained standing outside on our tiny front steps, staring up at the moon. 

Even though he is almost 21, I still walk out with him, under the various guises of hanging up our decorative front porch flag, taking some early morning pics, or putting out the garbage and making sure the front door is locked. Sadly, over the past few years, our neighborhood seems to have become home to some pretty unsavory and even dangerous characters, and we’ve come to know the township police officers here on a first-name basis.

I heard a noise near our alley, and felt a chill hit me that didn’t come from the frigid morning temperatures. Literally frozen with fear, I couldn’t move. I held my breath and waited. Nothing happened. No one appeared. 

Breathing out a sigh of relief, I glanced back up in the sky towards the moon, which looked to be fighting to be seen amid some clouds and the tree branches, and this verse suddenly came to mind:

In this life, we never seem to run out of things to fear, do we? Whether due to bad, past experiences (our own or even someone else’s), or because of future unknowns/uncertainties, all of us have a fear factor. 

We don't like to admit it, but we're all afraid of SOMETHING. And, for the most part, not all of us are afraid of the same things.

Some people are afraid of heights (that would be me)

Some are afraid of insects or big dogs or bats (oh my!)

Other folks are afraid of flying, of driving in snowy/icy weather or across bridges, or of public speaking (me once again)

And still others are afraid of the dark or of thunderstorms

At times, it may feel as if our fears, much like the bare, spidery tree branches in the photo above, are reaching up, entangling us and choking the light and life right out of us. 

In the midst of moments or even seasons that appear to be or truly are dark and fearful, we may think "what to do?", as a friend’s son used to say when he was very small.

The only thing you CAN do when you’re afraid: put your trust in God.

Some time ago, not long after I was handed my breast cancer diagnosis and just before I was about to be wheeled into surgery because of it, I was handed something else. Psalm 56:3

“When I am afraid, I will trust in You.”

Being a still-wet-behind-the-ears follower of Jesus and pretty much new to Scripture PERIOD (let alone its memorization), I had never heard of this verse. But, like a drowning woman, I grabbed onto it like the lifeline that it was for me (and still is), and held on for dear life!

I repeated it over and over in my head as my journey to the operating room took an unexpected detour to a ‘holding room,’ because the results of an earlier, routine (but obviously pretty important) pre-admission test had not come back yet.

I whispered the verse out loud again and again as medical personnel scurried around me, checking my vitals, making frantic phone calls to the lab for those missing in action test results, and doing their best to reassure me that everything would be fine.

“When I am afraid, I will trust in You.”

But this verse REALLY hit home once I was finally brought into the blindingly bright and starkly sterile operating room as several folks from the surgical team lifted me off the gurney and placed me onto the hard, bare operating table, while two others each grabbed an arm of mine and stretched them out to insert more tubes and attach more wires.

It was a frightening moment for me, and a somewhat bizarre thought wormed its way into my brain. I wondered if Jesus had felt that same sickening fear overtake and overwhelm Him as the Roman soldiers stretched His arms out onto the cross? Could the Father have impressed these very words from the Psalms upon Jesus during His time of agony in the garden of Gethsemane? Did He bring them to mind as nails and hammers were poised above His hands and feet? 

Did KNOWING that He could COMPLETELY trust in His Abba bring Jesus some measure of comfort, peace and the strength to endure what was coming at that very moment?

Because they did for me. Those 9 simple words -- “When I am afraid, I will trust in You”  -- plus the realization that Jesus could relate to what I was going through (fear), supernaturally brought me to a place of peace, comfort and the strength to endure what was coming, at the same time removing that fear factor.

And just for the record: although it sounds absolutely unthinkable, outrageous, and even sacrilegious for me to compare my circumstance to Jesus’s, please know that is certainly NOT my intent here. I merely wish to share my thoughts from the moments before my surgery, and to point out that IF that small portion of Scripture had indeed invaded Jesus's thoughts that long ago Friday afternoon, I HAVE TO believe that He surely must have benefited from it as well.

I deposited that verse, securely and permanently, into my heart that day, carrying it with me as I headed off to surgery. I continued to carry it into the second surgery that came along 6 months later. It remained there through the upcoming, draining chemo treatments; through the endless, taxing tests and painful procedures that awaited down the road.

And for all the dark and scary situations and experiences that have confronted-- and continue to confront -- me and my family since then, it remains my ‘go to’ verse.

Beloved - maybe you’ve found yourself in the midst of a dark and scary situation right now:

• The loss of a loved one
• or of a job
• or of a home 
• The shattering of a marriage 
• or of a friendship
• or of a parent/child relationship 
• Or your own health or financial crisis

And that light at the end of the tunnel everyone speaks of?  It seems somewhat hazy and not very bright -- if it can be seen at all. That still, small voice of God others remind you to listen for can often barely be heard above the crashing waves and deafening claps of thunder in your life’s particular storms.

“When I am afraid, I will trust in You.”

Dear one – may I encourage you and urge you TODAY to grab hold of this verse with both hands? And don't EVER let go. Carry it close to you in the midst of fear and uncertainty; as you walk through the tunnel's darkness and maneuver the raging storms.

  

Memorize it

Meditate on it

Whisper it

Shout it

Believe it

Own it

It’s not a magical incantation. It’s a powerful statement of faith and trust in the only One Who can bring you out of darkness, shelter you in life's storms and factor out your fear. 

The Divine Gifts of Challenges and Trials

Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations. ~ James 1:2, AMP


This morning, I opened up my  'Jesus Calling' devotional book and read the following:


"Let Me help you through this day.  The challenges you face are far too great for you to handle alone.  You are keenly aware of your helplessness in the scheme of events you face. This awareness opens up a choice: to doggedly go it alone or to walk with Me in humble steps of dependence.......so consider it all joy whenever you are enveloped in various trials.  These are gifts from Me, reminding you to rely on Me alone."**


Anyone who has never read this book as a part of their daily devotions can easily dismiss this as being just the creative, random writings of an author.  But believe me, it's not.  There are several peeps of mine (one being my darlin' friend, Toni, over at her Lakeside Lessons blog), who marvel at how uncanny the messages from this book can be for us on any given day, whatever our situations or circumstances may be.   I am on my second go-round of reading 'Jesus Calling'  and the messages, while the same as last year's, are never stale. 


So today's was yet again another right-on-time message from the Lord for me.   But truth be told, I did think, as I read the first sentence, "Oh no, Lord.  Challenges?  Will there be more?  In addition to all the OTHER ones I'm dealing with right now?  Really?? PULEEZE -- No mas, no mas!!!"

For the past month, I've been attending to my husband's every need since he had spinal fusion surgery -- helping him shower, getting him dressed and undressed, changing bandages on both incisions (one in the neck and one in his hip where they had to remove bone marrow),  making special meals for him since he can still only eat soft foods (soft as in mashed potatoes, Cream of Wheat, eggs, soups).   Taking on some of my husband's jobs here at home.  Trying to encourage him in his pain and frustration.  And --  just learning to BE STILL (big lesson for moi!) and sit with him, talking and watching movies together, which I'm seeing has actually STRENGTHENED our severely anemic marriage.  (Whoa, God -- what ARE You doing here?  So amazing!)


Yet, add all of this to the daily duties of a being homemaker, shuttling both kids back and forth to their respective schools and trying to find some quiet time to pray, read God's Word and journal/blog in the midst of it all and well, it has been quite challenging to say the least.  


In addition to all of this, I'm going through some rough waters with both my teen son and daughter.  Both aren't making good choices in their lives, continuing to do, say and be involved in things that as children of God, I don't think they should be doing.  There's just so much out there bombarding them daily, like a serpent holding out forbidden fruit, tempting them to "C'mon and try me!"  I've done and continue to do my best to teach them, lead them and guide them in the right direction, but they don't seem to be listening to me.  The sounds of warfare are deafening around here.  I feel tired, exasperated, discouraged, angry and at times, broken.


Challenges.  Trials.  Difficulties.  I sigh and wonder how many more of these challenges are on the horizon, headed my way today, and how much more I can take.

Yet, after reading through today's 'Jesus Calling' devotional entry, I am once again presented with something to consider, something Jesus wants me to know, to remember, to hold onto in the eye of the storm.


Challenges, trials and difficulties are very often gifts from God.  Yes, gifts.  Not the kind of gifts I'm certainly hoping for, but gifts nonetheless.  These Divine challenges actually help to remind me of my constant need for and continual reliance on my sweet Lord -- always Him, all of the time.  


Surrendering all of my (supposed) control and placing my total dependence on Jesus is to humble me, not humiliate me.  Humility is one of the virtues with which we are to clothe ourselves (Colossians 3:12), thereby making us more like Jesus, Whose very nature was one of humility (Philippians 2:1-8). 

In the midst of all of these current challenges, trials and difficulties, in the eye of the storm, Jesus wants me to look to Him continually.  To reach out to Him constantly. To cry out for His help, over and over.  I don't need to walk through all of this alone, a lesson our pastor taught so beautifully and creatively this past Sunday.  Jesus is here, and although it doesn't seem possible at times, I can experience joy in my journey. 


There is a song from the musical, 'Carousel!' which the character Nettie sings to Julie, a woman who finds herself drowning in deep despair.  I grew up hearing this song sung once a year at the end of every Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy telethon, and it made me cry each time.  As a child, I always considered it a very sad song, but that is not so.  It is a song of great encouragement; a song that Jesus very well could be singing to us, as He holds out His hand to us, not only offering us these gifts of Divine challenges and trials, but this hope-filled, loving promise: "You'll Never Walk Alone."

When you walk through a storm
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At the end of the storm
Is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark.


Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Tho' your dreams be tossed and blown.

Walk on, walk on

With hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never walk alone. ~ 'You'll Never Walk  Alone, written by Rodgers and Hammerstein


You'll Never Walk Alone


Above is a link to a YouTube video, with Johnny Cash doing the vocal honors.  I could have chosen other artists, but I feel that his life of brokenness and his looking to the Lord in the midst of his own storms lends quite a different flavor to this song. My hope is that this song and the words that the Lord gave me to share today will be of great encouragement to someone out there. 

**excerpt taken from 'Jesus Calling,'  by Sarah Young, copyright 2008, all rights reserved.

Worship Song Sunday -- The Solid Rock, by Avalon -- And a lesson....

"So then, everyone who hears My words and puts them into practice is like a wise man. He builds his house on the rock. The rain comes down. The water rises. The winds blow and beat against that house. But it does not fall. It is built on the rock. But everyone who hears my words and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man. He builds his house on sand. The rain comes down. The water rises. The winds blow and beat against that house. And it falls with a loud crash."  ~ Matthew 7:24-25, NIRV

I'd like to share my lesson notes from a  church sermon a few weeks ago, when one of our pastors preached on Matthew 7:24-29 -- Jesus' story of the wise builder and the foolish builder -- because of how it correlates to today's hymn.

Pastor Jared pointed out how the two builders were similar -- both were trying to construct something...a house that would perhaps be a legacy for their children, and their children's children, etc.  And apparently, both builders were affected by the same storm. 

He went on to tell how they were different -- the wise man took his time building his house, while the foolish man built his in haste.  Both built on different foundations -- one on a strong, firm foundation of solid rock; and the other on a weak, shaky foundation of sand, and where they built revealed the quality of the building, especially when a horrific storm came along.  

The wise builder took into account that storms WOULD come down the road, and he prepared accordingly. Jesus said that when the rains came, the waters rose and the winds beat against his house, it did not fall.   

But the foolish builder did not take into consideration the possibility of storms coming his way and therefore did not prepare his house adequately. Jesus said that when the rains came, the waters rose and the winds beat against his house, it fell with a loud crash (v. 27).  

Pastor Jared said that Jesus was comparing the wise builder to those who knew Him, heard His words and acted on them.  He compared the foolish builder to those who live as if God does not exist (Psalm 14:1- 'The fool says in his heart, "there is no God."'), hearing His words, but not putting them into practice.

Lesson learned from this sermon and this Scripture:

**Our best time to lay foundations is BEFORE the storms come -- not during, when we're so scared, confused and unfocused we're totally paralyzed; and not after, when it's much too late and we're left standing amid the rubble of our lives.   We must be prepared and ready.

Jesus has a promise, found in verse 25, for those of us whose hearts belong to Him:

For a life built on the Solid Rock of Jesus, no matter what happens to shock us, rock us or knock us down we can stand firm, with our faith remaining strong and secure.

May we be mindful today, as we gather together to worship our Lord, and every day, of the kind of life we are constructing, and on what kind of foundation we've chosen to build.

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus' Name.

On Christ, the soid Rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

You're My Only Hope

Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro:
He bustles about, but only in vain;
he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it.
But now, Lord, what do I look for?
My hope is in You. ~ Psalm 39:6-7

You can watch the news on TV, listen to it on the radio, read it in the newspaper or have it pop up as a feed to view from your computer, iPhone or iPad, thereby becoming privy to way too many stories of people all over the planet who find themselves suffering in hopeless situations. But really, you don't even have to go that far....just look around you in your own little world. Those in need of help, healing and hope are right under your nose -- people in your neighborhood, at your school or office, sitting next to you at church (church?? Does this shock you? It shouldn't)....maybe even in your own family. People who perhaps have no relationship with Jesus whatsoever, who think He's merely a figment of someone's overactive imagination or a character in a child's fairy tale.  Or people who've had a relationship with Jesus, but over the years, for whatever reason, have let that relationship fall by the wayside.  Maybe, the one in need of help, healing and hope.....is you.

Doctors hand you a frightening health diagnosis...but they just can't seem to find the proper treatment for it.  You've lost your job due to downsizing and day after day, you fill out online applications and send out your resume to everyone under the sun....and everyday, you're met with silence.  A lifelong dream is shattered....and there doesn't seem to be enough glue in the world to piece it back together.  You watch as people in your life seem to have blessing upon blessing rain down upon them....yet you feel continually bombarded by storm after storm, and the light at the end of the tunnel has become just a lame cliché for you.  You feel....hopeless.

You hate your life and you feel like packing it in and giving up.  Maybe you already have.  In your anger and doubt and fear and despair, you've turned your back on your First Love and walked away from Him for a time.  Perhaps for a very long time. But you've found that life without Him isn't what you thought it would be. You're confused and ashamed and guilt-ridden.  Like a runaway, prodigal child, you feel you can't ever come home.  Yet you couldn't be further from the truth.

While scrolling through my emails on Sunday afternoon, I came across one from DaySpring, the Christian greeting card company.  In the email were two very short devotional thoughts, each with a Scripture verse from DaySpring's cofounder and writer, Roy Lessin.  Below is the one I was immediately drawn to and would like to share with you here:

There is hope...

You can turn back to God,
because He has not turned His back on you.

You can hold on to God,
because He has not released His hold on you.

You can love God again,
because He has never stopped loving you.

I have formed you, you are My servant; O Israel, you will not be forgotten by Me! I have blotted out, like a thick cloud, your transgressions, And like a cloud, your sins. Return to Me, for I have redeemed you. Isaiah 44:21-22

What an encouragement!  Yes, there is hope. No matter what we've done or said, no matter how far we've strayed or where it is we've come from, the Lord's love for us is available, unconditional and unfailing.  He is an endless fountain of mercy, grace and forgiveness.  And though you may not think so or feel it, you are firmly in His grip. Like the father in the parable of the prodigal son, our Lord waits for us, searching the road for a glimpse of us, His beloved children, ready to welcome us into His arms. We are NOT beyond redemption. He is our Rock and our Refuge.  He is our strong tower and our firm foundation.  He is our Anchor.   All hope is found in Christ alone.  

In the movie, Star Wars, there's a scene in which Princess Leia is in dire need and reaches out to  Obi-Wan for help.  She tells him, "This is our most desperate hour. Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope!"  In our most desperate hour, in our most desperate moments, Jesus is our ONLY Hope.  In church on Sunday, our worship leader told us this:  "With Christ in our life, there is endless hope. Without Him in our life, it's a hopeless end."

Don't give up. Come to Jesus.  There IS hope in Him. Believe it. 

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from Him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation;
He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend on God;
He is my mighty rock, my refuge. ~ Psalm 62:5-7

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand ~ In Christ Alone, by Natalie Grant

A Prayer To Abba

For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!" ~ Romans 8:15 (NASB)

Abba Father, there are days that come when we feel so overwhelmed by our life circumstances; by the situations and events we see taking place all around us; by the people in our lives who are often abrasive, deceitful, difficult to love or forgive -- cold and uncaring or just plain too busy for us. 

Things aren’t working out the way we want them to; life isn't turning out the way we’d hoped, dreamed or planned. We cry out to You in desperation, but our voices echo back to us, our tears splash back on our faces and we feel alone in our struggles and our desperate needs. We wonder where You are in the midst of these dark and violent storms, these fiery trials and frightening happenings, these climbs up the steep mountainside......are You listening? Why won’t You answer the cries of Your children? We are anxious and afraid.

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Oh, but Abba, You DO hear us and recognize our voices. You are well aware of our circumstances, You know exactly what we need. You see us in our wilderness and You are not surprised to find us there. You are with us, right beside us in the lonely deep, dark pit or in the chaotic and frantic crowd, although we find it hard to see You through our tear soaked eyes, and to hear You and feel Your presence above our rapidly beating hearts, racing minds and shaking bodies. 

Help us to be still and know that You are God, and that You are constantly working behind the scenes in our favor, although we can’t see the work being done nor the fruit of that work as yet. Perhaps You are leading us down a path we don’t want to travel.  Perhaps You are preparing us for something yet to come. Or You are teaching us a hard and painful lesson we don’t wish to learn. You tell us, “Follow Me,” but we are afraid of the destination and the unfamiliar change of scenery. 

Help us, dear Father, to trust You totally and completely, because we know that You are merciful, forgiving and compassionate, always offering us Your amazing grace and unfailing love. You have ransomed us; You know us well, calling us by our names because we are Yours. When we pass through the deep waters, You WILL be with us; when we go through rivers of difficulty in our lives, You WILL NOT let us drown; and when we walk through the fires of oppression, You WILL NOT let them burn us up nor allow the flames to consume us as we fear they will. 

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We are so very precious to You and You love us. Help us to remember this, dearest Abba Father, and to not be afraid, no matter what. We ask this in the wonderful Name of Jesus, amen.

Why should the Father bother to call us His children?
Why should the Spirit hear it when we pray?
Why should the Father bother to be concerned with all our needs?
It's all because of what the Son has done
And we cry "Abba Father, Abba Father
Abba Father, Abba Father"
We cry "Abba Father, Abba Father
Abba Father, Abba Father" ~ Why Should The Father Bother? by Petra